Sunday, March 11, 2012

I Hate Dating. Part One.

I’m not sure I’ve ever been on a date with someone who seemed as nervous and insecure as I always feel on dates.  I usually loosen up pretty quickly, but with my date on Thursday I just felt anxious the whole time.  I think things went well for a few reasons despite the nerves.  First, we ate dinner for two hours and talked pretty easily the whole time.  The conversation was terrific- just a hint of nervous energy in the air- and he didn’t seem in a hurry to leave at all.  Second, after dinner he was kind of like “what do you wanna do now?” instead of “nice meeting you, take care”.  We walked the long way to our separate bus/train and talked some more.  And third, he said “we should do this again sometime” at our parting (to which I literally said “yes please”).

But I’m also worried that it didn’t go well for a few reasons.  First, I was in high ditz form that night and said some airheaded things.  Second, I sort of criticized him when he was telling me how horrible of a parent the woman was that he was a nanny for, saying that it must be really hard being a single mom.   And third, at one point when we were deciding what to eat I said “Oh but you don’t like fish right?... Was that you?”.  Doh!  I don’t know if he caught that one though.  And he said likes fish sometimes, so that was some other profile I was reading.  Why can’t I control the things that come out of my mouth?  Geez!

… Hold the phone.  In my shame I just jumped on the freesite to confirm whether he had said he hated fish and HE DID SAY THAT.  That only makes half of what I said dumbass-y.  But I also saw something I wish I hadn’t.  Him online at that exact moment!  This makes me squirmy because of an additional bit of info I have yet to disclose which is the exchanging of texts since our date.  Today and yesterday we’ve texted but he hasn’t taken the initiative to ask me out again yet and I’m too traditional and stubborn to ask him myself.  So he’s online either to read my hilarious emails to him for the millionth time or he’s checking out more girls.

 And THIS is why online dating is sucky.  Everyone’s playing the field.  What I want after a great first date is for a guy to be like “Wow, she was great!  I’ve got to make plans to see her again, and soon!”, not “I liked her okay, but maybe something better is just around the corner.  I’ll call her in a week just to keep her around.”  After my date with this guy I found all of the other guys I’ve been communicating with to be much less interesting.  Why can’t that be a two way street?   

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